hey guys

today
well...
i guess...
i didn't realli like today...
well first i had training in the morning...
and well...every saturday morning when i go for training....
i try to leave the house before my parents are up..so that you know..
they won't nag at me coz i'm not very nag-resistant...
i can't stand people nagging at me...
not my friends,, not my parents not my teachers...
i juz dont like anyone nagging at me...
coz i like what i do and i do everything i want everything i like...
i dont care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yup...niwaes..i woke up late...
i wanted to wake up at six...
bathe...dilly-dally...
and then maybe leave the house at six forty...juz before they wake up...
but when i woke up...
well...
the sun was already up...coz it was already six forty!!!!
wahaha...
yup so by the time i was done maybe it was seven and when i went down to the living room my dad was already reading the papers...
and that totally sucks...
i was carrying my racket bag and wearing my jersey...
and he actually asked where i was going...
like duh~~~
of course i'm going for training...
where else could i go???
ice-skating??? k-boxing??? watch a movie???
at seven in the morning...
and then he went on and on about how i should concentrate more on my studies...
blah blah blah...how i should clean up after myself...
blah blah blah...
its juz pure blah blah blah bullshit...
he if juz went "bloop bloop bloop" maybe i would haf understood him better but well..
i juz wished he would shut up and leave me alone...
or maybe say something else instead of ur brother this ur brother tt....
i'm realli sad whenever i hear abt my brother from them...
and how good he is coz i noe it for myself...
and i noe they dont think i can ever compare...and tt sux..it really really sux...
coz i'm sure they don't ever say "ur sister this ur sister tt" in front of him...good or bad...
its so unfair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
life is so unfair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i noe tt for myself and nobody has to remind me tt they feel it sometimes too...
I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well yup...
den i think he stopped only after i left the house...
and well i got to school and they were doing fumigation and i think the school management should juz screw themselves...
ya..i'm losing my temper..
i'm behaving as though the whole world owes me money...
but i couldn't be bothered...
screw them....
like couldn't they haf done it like in the afternoon when it'll be really quiet and the fumigation kills only the mosquitoes and nothing else...
dumb asses...
go screw urself...
it's a pity the fumigation didn't kill any of the bloody screwed up badminton teachers in charge...
both of them should go for plastic surgery but they both have "budget problem" man...
assholes...
yup..niwaes...
trng...
it was boring...
but heck it...
i live to train...even if its going to be like this for the next six month i'll still hang around...
yup...
did the usual...updated on my records...
but yup...badminton rawks!!!
den we had to wash e weights...
oh my "shen"...
super duper stinko lo....
and then we had to hang them on the ramp where they would be getting the most sun and drying up the fastest...
yup...
and we had to constantly run out and check tt nobody took our weights...haha..
but they'll be dumb to steal it coz they'll be too heavy to run if they got caught..haha..
yup..but when i was abt to leave i realised they locked the shutters...and we had to take a long way down and if we wanted to take the weights we would haf to lunge them over a long distant..
therefore me and xin hao...we decided to be lazy...esp xin hao..ahaha...
i walked up the ramp...and then i threw the weights to him outside the hall one by one...
thank goodness none landed on the ramp shelter because if i had to climb out and get it i think the fall fro the sky thing would happen again..haha..
but ya..two didn't make the flight and fell to the parade square and i had to run down and throw them up..
haha...
it was quite exciting actually...but well.
all good things come to an end and i had to go home after tt..haha..which really sucked...

yup...den i went home...
thank goodness my brother was already home and my parents were too busy bothering abt him to bother abt me...
which was good and bad at the same time...
i could juz feel the jealousy rising in me...
its really hard for me to spend weekends at home nowadays man...
i can't do anything i want at all...coz well..."make ur brother happy, he'll only be home for the weekend"...which arh....
i can't say anything can i???
yup...den i took my lunch...and after lunch i still felt hungry because my maid cooked fried rice and i utterly hate fried rice so i only ate a little...
den i finished the last of the oreo cereal we had at home...
den i took a two hour long nap..
yup i didn't bathe..ahaha...gross...
i'm usually such a cleaniness freak...
but i guess i was juz too tired and irritated to be bothered...
yup...but its good to sleep..
sometimes when i'm dealt with problems i juz wish i could sleep for weeks and weeks or months or years...until they go away...so tt i wouldn't haf to deal...
but i guess...i always deal because things left hanging in the middle of nowhere irritates shit hell out of me...
yup...

den when i woke up around like 4 plus..i had like 5 miss calls...
mostly unimportant...
juz asking me to go hang out...buy stuff..nj college day which my brother is currently at...
yup..took a shower...waited for my pw mates to turn up...
well yup...juz tt..
and when one of them did..i had to go down and get the door for her coz my parents are always like "take care of your own guests" which is like bloody irritating again coz they never treat my brothers friends like tt...my brothers friends are...well..heck them..dont get me started...
and when i went down..my mum told me my brother got into medicine...
which was great..
i'm realli glad for him and my parents are really happy...
but tt meant my parents had to compensate LTA $2500 coz my brother forfeited his scholarship...
which i guess would be okay coz my parents could afford it and its like really really great he got into medicine..
but..well...
i decided to ask for a new pair of sports shoes coz my shoes realli CMI...i've switched to wearing my last pair...really last pair of running shoes left...my coach gave them to me...previous coach so they're really quite precious i guess and i treasure them alot..
but they said no....
something about my bill the past year...
blah blah blah...me spending alot of money on books and camps and everything to do with school coz my results aren't good enough for any edusave or cash awards...
and ya...
i guess that really broke my heart...
i can never understand...
ya...i'm not as good..
i dont do as well academically...
i can;t play the piano as well...
i probably can only dream of getting into the medicine faculty...
but well...
too bad i guess....
so tt realli sucks....
it realli realli sux....
things realli realli sucks recently...

i can't go for obs coz i'm a bloody reserve...reserve...
i hate tt word...reserve...
i am a reserve...
and
my brother is always better..
better better...
and then there's that bloody irritating badminton discussion with the teachers and the other schools are better..
better..juz better..
and we go in and get humiliated...
better better better....
lousier..worse off...
i hate it!!!!
irritating shits...
better better better.......

V. sad.
tingyz~~ T-T