hey guys

hmmm.
once again,
i don't know,
to be
happy or sad.

yesterday,
i held a
party
at
home.
it was a
bang!
it wasn't
really
party-like
however,
i had
lotsa time
to catch up
with
all my
"old"
friends.
they're the
people
closest to
my heart.
all the times
we had....

however,
disappointments
are
unavoidable
in life.
my appeal
to acjc,
was rejected
flat.
everytime
i think of
this failure,
my eyes
brim
with "salt-water"
haha.
its...
i dind't
seat around
all holiday
and wished
to be
accepted.
i went
for their
trainings,
i pestered
my teacher,
for my
testimonial.
i realli
tried.
ALL FOR NOTHING.

can
someone please
tell me.
i'm not dumb,
i'm not lazy.
i already
know that
actually.
or at least,
its what
i think.
but
at this point.
i
just need
a little
confirmation.
because
well..
it dosen't
matter now,
anyway.
maybe,
i didn't
try hard enough.
actually
i know.
i'm realli
quite depressed.

signing off
tingyz~~ :P:P